day one of unemployment

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day one of unemployment

PostPosted by McFuck » Tue Jun 04, 2013 4:11 pm

and (fuck me) I've got a hangover. :cry:

totally at loose ends here, spinning my wheels, don't know where to start. guess I'll sign on at the Labour Exchange.
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Re: day one of unemployment

PostPosted by haveyougotsoup » Tue Jun 04, 2013 7:36 pm

McFuck wrote:and (fuck me) I've got a hangover. :cry:

totally at loose ends here, spinning my wheels, don't know where to start. guess I'll sign on at the Labour Exchange.

Poor sod!
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Re: day one of unemployment

PostPosted by poppymoon » Wed Jun 05, 2013 12:27 am

McFuck, have you considered doing phone sex? There's money to be made. My pal does it, she's got a face like a smacked arse, but she pays her rent and keeps a retired racehorse. I'd do it if I didn't sound like Kenneth Williams on speed.

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Re: day one of unemployment

PostPosted by Withwine and I » Wed Jun 05, 2013 1:25 am

poppymoon wrote:I'd do it if I didn't sound like Kenneth Williams on speed.


Never underestimate the human capacity for fascinating fetishes.
They found him wandering round Regent's Park with a cheap bottle of sherry...

And like a fool I mixed them and it strangled up my mind, and now people just get uglier and I have no sense of time...
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Re: day one of unemployment

PostPosted by crooked » Wed Jun 05, 2013 7:59 pm

Chin up.
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Re: day one of unemployment

PostPosted by oomska » Fri Jun 07, 2013 12:50 pm

Mcfuck ... enjoy the freedom while you can ... though as long as you have a brain that thinks positively and desire you will find something :thumbup:


poppymoon wrote:McFuck, have you considered doing phone sex? There's money to be made. My pal does it, she's got a face like a smacked arse, but she pays her rent and keeps a retired racehorse. I'd do it if I didn't sound like Kenneth Williams on speed.


Ooh Matron Poppymoon ... no sex talk there, you will upset the boss ... though I always imagined those sextalk girls either knitting or cleaning out the kitty litter tray in their PJs whilst engaged in a steamy conversaton about what they would like to do to me in the shower with a Turnip and a battery drill ... damn .. then I got cut off :lol:


Withwine and I wrote:
Never underestimate the human capacity for fascinating fetishes.


That`s because Mother Nature (bless her) is a part time Dominatrix who oversees an extremely perverted Chicken ranch crammed full of overcurious Homo erectus and not forgetting the female equivalent .. Homo bagshoeus :lol:
.`. `. .


.`.
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Re: day one of unemployment

PostPosted by poppymoon » Sun Jun 09, 2013 1:01 am

Sorry Oomska, and Crooked, I'll curtail the smut. :oops:

(She listens to the grunts and groans when she's doing the ironing, or reading Take A Break Fate and Fortune.)
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Re: day one of unemployment

PostPosted by oomska » Sun Jun 09, 2013 7:34 am

poppymoon wrote:Sorry Oomska, and Crooked, I'll curtail the smut. :oops:

(She listens to the grunts and groans when she's doing the ironing, or reading Take A Break Fate and Fortune.)


Matron Poppy ... Nobody should have to apologise for innuendo :wink: , I like Kenneth williams :thumbup: ... and anyway we don`t want to lose any more regular members around here, the place has become as boring as a dry hump with Cheryl Cole as it is :lol:
.`. `. .


.`.
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Re: day one of unemployment

PostPosted by haveyougotsoup » Sun Jun 09, 2013 10:40 am

I'll take a dry hump with Cheryl Cole any day. :roll: :roll:
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Re: day one of unemployment

PostPosted by crooked » Sun Jun 09, 2013 12:55 pm

I'd fight for her (thick racist Geordie) love if you know what I mean.
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Re: day one of unemployment

PostPosted by oomska » Mon Jun 10, 2013 11:05 am

oomska wrote:
poppymoon wrote:Sorry Oomska, and Crooked, I'll curtail the smut. :oops:

(She listens to the grunts and groans when she's doing the ironing, or reading Take A Break Fate and Fortune.)


Matron Poppy ... Nobody should have to apologise for innuendo :wink: , I like Kenneth williams :thumbup: ... and anyway we don`t want to lose any more regular members around here, the place has become as boring as a dry hump with Cheryl Cole as it is :lol:



Which would apply equally to Victoria Beckam ... in fact I would tell them both I was too busy and they should adhere to the restraining order and dessist from stalking me :wink:
.`. `. .


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Re: day one of unemployment

PostPosted by McFuck » Mon Jun 10, 2013 4:57 pm

no, I hadn't considered the phone sex but I don't think I'd be any good at it.

speaking of which, my friend brought back some smut mag from his trip to UK, and we were wondering - - what's the fascination with phone sex with grannies? Because half the ads were of wrinkled old cunts with phone numbers. Who wants to fuck their granny??? :shock:
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Re: day one of unemployment

PostPosted by Withwine and I » Mon Jun 10, 2013 8:41 pm

Withwine and I wrote:Never underestimate the human capacity for fascinating fetishes.
They found him wandering round Regent's Park with a cheap bottle of sherry...

And like a fool I mixed them and it strangled up my mind, and now people just get uglier and I have no sense of time...
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Re: day one of unemployment

PostPosted by oomska » Tue Jun 11, 2013 10:17 am

The directors of this advert for the new series of Mating season must have been reading my mind or spying on my Google history .. :lol:


.`. `. .


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Re: day one of unemployment

PostPosted by Ellietronic » Tue Jun 11, 2013 11:31 pm

McFuck wrote:no, I hadn't considered the phone sex but I don't think I'd be any good at it.

speaking of which, my friend brought back some smut mag from his trip to UK, and we were wondering - - what's the fascination with phone sex with grannies? Because half the ads were of wrinkled old cunts with phone numbers. Who wants to fuck their granny??? :shock:


To be fair, with all the teens getting pregnant over here so they can have a free house, most grannies these days are in their 30s. Plus their frequent tanning beds cause wrinkles. So now you know.

Apparently a lot of blokes that ring up those phone sex lines are just really lonely guys that just want to talk to someone, not necessarily in a smutty way.
Although I can't remember who told me that fact, and also I'm not sure I believe it. I know what you men are like. :P

Withwine and I wrote:Never underestimate the human capacity for fascinating fetishes.

Some days online I'll accidentally stumble across something that just makes me shut my laptop down and be done with the internet for that day. And I wouldn't call them fascinating. Did you know there are grown men out there fetishising my little pony now? A fucking cartoon for little girls. The mind boggles. What happened to a good old fashioned spanking? People online sicken me. :x
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