beans on toast!

Vent spleen here.

beans on toast!

PostPosted by jeff wode » Tue Oct 30, 2007 5:29 am

my fave easy to make meal, fooking lovely.
so i go in the kitchen, its late, after 12 and ive been working all day and decorating the lounge all evening, and had no lunch tea or supper. my mrs is dozing in the lounge. so i ask, "you hungry?" to which i get a dozy "no" on with the beans, open the bread bin, yeehar, thick toasty bread, pop it in the toaster, and pop my head round the door "im making something to eat, you want anything?", and again, "no" so up pops the toast and i put some more in, and butter these 2, then i stir the bubbling heinz beans and again look in to see the boss now awake reading her magazine. "im making beans on toast, you sure you dont want any? again, i get, "no , im not hungry" so i pop back in the kitchen, get the plates and cutlery sorted, and just in case call out to her, "what about just some toast then? shall i do you a couple of slices?" this time a more forcefull "NO" comes back the reply, so, knowing when im beaten, i decide not to make more toast, and pour the now cooked beans over the 2 slices of toast on my plate. a good sprinkling with plenty of white pepper and im sorted. pick up my plate and the sideplate with my 2 slices on and walk in the lounge. as im eating alone i sit on the sofa and put the plates on the small table in front of me, i pick up my fork and am about to dive into my breakfast/lunch/tea/supper all combined when she does it. simultaneously she reaches a hand past my incredulous face and picks a slice of toast off the sideplate before me, and says, "now ive seen it, i am quite peckish" !! my face goes as red as the beans on my plate, steam spurts from my ears.

"BOOM"

every time. every single fucking time she does this. and when she refuses and i actually do make her something, she comes out with "well i told you i wanst hungry, and now YOUVE wasted this food" and then procedes to watch it go cold in front of her. yet when i dont make her something, she just helps herself to mine. only a small thing, but it drives me fucking crazy.
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PostPosted by McFuck » Tue Oct 30, 2007 3:25 pm

:lol: :lol: :lol:
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PostPosted by Parkin » Tue Oct 30, 2007 7:24 pm

You craked me up mate ,.. brilliant !!!
This bit especially,..
as im eating alone i sit on the sofa and put the plates on the small table in front of me,


so if you hadn't been eating alone would you have got out the best 'dinner service' and sat at the table ?? :lol:
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PostPosted by jeff wode » Tue Oct 30, 2007 8:37 pm

Parkin wrote:You craked me up mate ,.. brilliant !!!
This bit especially,..
as im eating alone i sit on the sofa and put the plates on the small table in front of me,


so if you hadn't been eating alone would you have got out the best 'dinner service' and sat at the table ?? :lol:


no, if i wasnt eating alone, i would have sat at the dining table, but as i was on my todd, i sat on the sofa so i could watch the telly.
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PostPosted by crooked » Tue Oct 30, 2007 10:21 pm

I usually eat sitting here at the computer.
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PostPosted by The Purveyor » Tue Oct 30, 2007 11:42 pm

Does Danny pull any of those tricks Joe?
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PostPosted by crooked » Wed Oct 31, 2007 1:35 am

Nah she happily eats loads of horrible vegetarian food.
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PostPosted by Parkin » Wed Oct 31, 2007 3:44 am

crooked wrote:Nah she happily eats loads of horrible vegetarian food.


Make sure you have lots of ventilation in your room,.. you don't want to die from all the methane your veggie girlfriend expels !! :lol: :lol:
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PostPosted by crooked » Wed Oct 31, 2007 4:29 am

All I eat is beans on toast so its her who is in danger.
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PostPosted by Parkin » Wed Oct 31, 2007 4:52 am

Baked beans need Worcestershire Sauce and black pepper added to them,.. And if you are Eco friendly (unlike Jeff :roll: ) then you will heat them in the microwave, and not on the hob !! :lol:
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PostPosted by jeff wode » Wed Oct 31, 2007 1:33 pm

Parkin wrote:Baked beans need Worcestershire Sauce and black pepper added to them,.. And if you are Eco friendly (unlike Jeff :roll: ) then you will heat them in the microwave, and not on the hob !! :lol:


twaddle, worcester sauce isnt veggie anyhow, its got anchovies in it, the only thing to put into baked beans is a large lump of strong lancashire cheese.!!
nowt wrong with veggies btw, ive not eaten meat for over 10 years now!
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PostPosted by McFuck » Wed Oct 31, 2007 3:29 pm

jeff wode wrote:nowt wrong with veggies btw, ive not eaten meat for over 10 years now!


ah, another one gone over to the dark side!
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PostPosted by The Purveyor » Wed Oct 31, 2007 3:50 pm

We want something's flesh!
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PostPosted by Horrorshow » Fri Nov 09, 2007 12:01 am

A firm favourite. I too ejaculate a yeeha at thick bread. If anyone perpetrated such an act upon me I'd give them a sound spanking.

I don't eat animal flesh (excepting bits of skin from my fingers and lips and such), but I do drink Guinness and Murphy's. Because I am twattish.
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PostPosted by jeff wode » Fri Nov 09, 2007 1:21 am

Horrorshow wrote:A firm favourite. I too ejaculate a yeeha at thick bread. If anyone perpetrated such an act upon me I'd give them a sound spanking.

I don't eat animal flesh (excepting bits of skin from my fingers and lips and such), but I do drink Guinness and Murphy's. Because I am twattish.



i dont know about ejaculating at thick bread, i tend to prefer marge on it !
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